Black sistas: WE MUST STAND FOR EACH OTHER.

Hey ladies and gents, it's ya girl Untouched Jewel in the building! Hope everyone has had a wonderful day today on this beautiful and yet hot Sunday (at least here in Cali, anyway. LOL.) Today I had a slight epiphany, and I'm sure some others have had this same epiphany before I did probably eons ago.

Anywho, I was posting a comment on a friend of mine's photo on Facebook, and I gotta admit, it was a cute picture of her. I know I usually don't pay other females compliments, because (to me IMHO) it comes off kinda lesbianesque or too prissy. I'm neither extreme. But anyway, I paid her a compliment and the response was well received. I've said that to say this: too many of us sistas don't compliment each other enough if they look nice, smell nice, etc. Don't get me wrong, I'm guilty enough as is for not doing that same thing, but my reasons are not for the purpose of hating on another chick, because she looked better than I did. Not at all. But there have been times I have stepped in a room and have gotten the "look at this Valley girl thinking she too cute coming up in here like she's all that" type of stares, glares and flat out mad dogged faces. And the moment I would get them, they felt like daggers piercing me. The killing part in all of that is I would just walk in a room and not say a word. 

Sistas, all this hate we spew at each other for childish reasons has to stop! We talk about another sista when she's got it going on. Don't be mad at her for steppin out and looking her best. Just because you are looking sub-par is not that person's problem....it's yours! We see it in movies, we see it on the street, we see it in the club, and it's ridiculous. We claim we are grown a** women, yet we act our shoe size and not our age. Now I can see if some of us see a sista whose looking homely or tore back, then we should step in like an intervention and help them out to look like they are in tip-top shape. But if you see a chick and her swagger is A+, don't be so quick to dog her out. Somewhere along the line you know she look good, she knows she looks good and yet you are finding everything about her to be all to the wrong, don't be mad cause it ain't you in what that sista got on. If she's rockin an outfit, hairstyle or something and doing it absolute justice, PAY HER A COMPLIMENT.


This is where our self-hatred comes into play. We hate ourselves as sistas to the point to where we are quick to place that attack on some unsuspecting female who hasn't done nothin to us and at that point, it's a free-for-all. And God forbid if a man gets involved....*serious side eye action*  In this day and time, sistas don't have the luxury of hating or hurting one another, because with obstacles we have stacked against us (i.e. contracting AIDS, feeling competed against by another woman of another race, etc.) It's already bad enough that we get stereotyped all the time, but add the hassle of us women (black women) to be doing that?!

Sure enough there are a good number of us who go out in public and display our "angry bitter b*tch" stereotype in rare form. At that point, that's when we would need to pull our sista to the side and check her on it, but yet do it tactfully and with class. Some of us will get pissy and take a correction out of love and respect as being being fronted and dissed. We don't need to have a man tell us we are something we already knew. If our self-esteems are intact, it wouldn't kill us to pay a compliment to another sista and go on about our business. Does it kill you to say: "Hey girl, you are rockin them shoes to death", or I love that outfit on you", or this or that color works well with your skin tone"? Answer: NO. So why is it such a hassle to be nice to another sista whom hasn't done any harm to you at all?

Like I said before I have been guilty of not paying compliments to other sistas before for other reasons not pertaining to some sort of hate, but it isn't justifiable nor excusable in my circumstance. We black women need to uplift each other in such a way that even if a black man was to come in and try to tear down our self-worth and esteem, we wouldn't in no way be affected by it, because we all know at some point we are worth everything and then some. And if there is something about one another that needs to be in any way corrected, we must check each other on it in a manner that isn't demeaning or disrespectful.

We need each other in times of happiness and adversity. Without that sisterhood (be it blood related or not), how will we as black woman be able to lean on and depend on someone when we are hating ourselves and each other?

Until Next Post,
Peace & Blessings,
Untouched Jewel