Ain't Nothin Happy about Valentine's Day

Good afternoon ladies and gents. It's Untouched Jewel in the buildin today.

The reason I write this post the way I did today, because even though Valentine's Day is just one day, to someone somewhere it can be a scar that hasn't quite healed. It could be a very fond memory that replays in the back of their mind. Even if they have moved on with life, some things are still hard to forget. I know for me, it's both. I'm sure there are plenty of you out there reading this that would tell me "girl, move on", or "stop dwelling on the past." Here's what I say about that: until you have walked a mile in my shoes and loved someone wholeheartedly who practically threw you away like yesterday's trash, don't tell me what I'm supposed to feel, how I'm supposed to heal and in what time frame I'm supposed to move on.

I haven't had a decent Valentine's Day since I was with the sperm donor known as my son's "father".....that's been a cooooool minute. But what adds insult to injury about this day was what happened 4 years ago. The day before, I spoke to my son's father & not one time did he say shit to me about what was really up his sleeve. The next day he married the woman who had his kid that even he didn't know existed. Now mind you the child he and I had together was almost 3 years old at the time. What was so fucked up about it all was the fact that he's giving me lip service about let's start over and be a family yada, yada, yada. BULLSHIT! That's exactly what the fuck I got was bullshit. And since that time, I don't give Valentine's Day any type of praise, pay it any significance, or celebrate the "day of love".

I'm just about at the point where I've tried being open to love and all it entails, but just seeing some of the examples that have been placed in front of me, I almost rather not be in it or embrace it. Sad part in it all is nobody wants to be in love anymore or even remotely take the time out to love someone wholeheartedly. LOVE IS A LOST ART. I feel like whatever love I do have left is damn near depleted. What I have left I don't wanna give out to anyone who doesn't have my love, feelings or best interest at heart. Truthfully, it saddens me to see how the state of affairs are these days when it comes to love and relationships.

Tina Turner said it best: "What's love got to do with it? What's love but a second hand emotion."

All I gotta say is send up a flare when people decide to want to love, be in love and do it sincerely. In the mean time, love has packed up and moved out.

Until Next Post,
Fingaz & Blessins,
Untouched Jewel